Wednesday 28 October 2009

Quarter Life Crisis

I should probably elaborate on my last post a little. According to wikipedia I'm having a quarter life crisis, a time usually in the mid twenties where one is no longer a young and care free individual but at the same time not quite ready to cross the line into being a true 'grown up'. It is perhaps a little cliche and even melodramatic to describe this as a crisis but there doesn't seem like a better way!

I'm currently working as an F2 in A+E, a job which I enjoy and dislike equally. It is tremendously interesting, varied and requires much improvisation but the shifts are a pain in the arse, some of the staff rather useless and I don't feel I'm particularly good at it. The reason for the last point is I lack the depth of medical knowledge (partly through being a lazy medical student and partly through being at a shit medical school) I also have a crisis of self-confidence in A+E, something I'm not really used to. Another thing that doesn't help is I'm staying in hospital accommodation during the week and only seeing missbliss when I'm not working (which is rare in A+E). I hate my prison cell room with a passion but it's the cheapest, most convenient option. One thing I do know is that I will really miss A+E as a job but will be glad to be rid of the shifts!

Careerwise, I'm pleased to say that medicine is for me, I just have no idea what specialty. I know I almost certainly don't want to do general medicine although I would love to have the level of knowledge that goes with being a medical registrar! I've always had a passion for orthopaedics but have next to zero anatomy knowledge and am not quite the right personality type. I've also always liked and been quite good at radiology but I suspect that would bore me and I miss the acute side of things. A+E is great fun but the politics and shifts are hurrendous! GP land would suit my personality and lifestyle but again I would find it rather dull. The option of being a GP with an interest in A+E might be a possibility to combine the best of both worlds, I have spoken to GPs who do this so I know it is possible but am not sure how easy it would be.

So where does this leave me? Well specialty training applications open in a month and I haven't a clue. The other option is New Zealand for a year but whether that would help I don't know, I suspect it would just be a postponement of the same issues but at least it would be an interesting adventure!

Crisis might be a strong word but it is all I can think about at the moment and it's driving me a little bit crazy and making me feel useless! Although I'm not quite at the stage of buying a bright red sports car (as much as I'd love to, I don't have the money). And the loose women? well that just doesn't appeal in the slightest, I'm quite happy with missbliss thanks!

Any advice would be grately appreciated.

Monday 26 October 2009

Hi

For anyone still reading - what shall I do with my life?